Teaching Our Child to Express their ‘Negative’ Emotions

The Resourceful MotherThe first step in taking responsibility for ourselves and coming to know and love ourselves, is identifying, understanding, feeling and expressing our ‘negative’ emotions; self-esteem is based on the acceptance of all thoughts and feelings as one’s own. If we want our child to take responsibility for themselves and come to know and love themselves, we need to help them identify, understand, feel and express their emotions in the same way that we accomplish this task. In this way, they will learn to see feelings as information. As we learn to balance our own emotions, we are better able to show our child how to balance their emotions. It is through the sharing of emotions that we build our connection with our child and genuinely come to know them.

The best-selling book “Self-Esteem” suggests the following ways for helping children specifically with expressing their strong, ‘negative’ feelings in a healthy manner:

  • “Encourage little children to growl, hit a pillow, or stamp their feet to express angry feelings. Older children might draw a pic or write a letter or telephone a sympathetic friend to tell them what happened. Sports and strenuous physical activities can provide another outlet for strong feelings.
  • Encourage your children to use their imagination to express their feelings. Do you want her to disappear? Be invisible?
  • Share a story about yourself in a similar predicament, feeling similar things. Your child can feel that she is not alone in her feelings and take comfort that you understand.
  • Be a good role model in how you deal with your own strong feelings. Share some of your own coping skills.
  • Help your children feel good about themselves even in the face of defeat or disappointment e.g. “Even though you were lost and confused, you had the good sense to ask the saleslady for help. How did you think of that?”

Just prior to my mother-in-law’s funeral, I read about the need for a child to “own” and express their feelings fully, without judgment or curtailment. I came to understand that when we tell our child that their feelings are wrong or inappropriate, our child doesn’t feel safe. When my mother-in-law’s funeral service ended, our family and friends began filing out of the church, while my daughter, Paige, at the age of six, sat on my lap crying. She cried and cried and cried, long after everyone had left the church. I held her, gently telling her to let it all out. When she finished crying, we left the church and climbed into the limousine to attend her grandmother’s burial. Years later, Paige had the same full release of sadness and pain when her dog was attacked by another dog and killed instantly. I noticed in both cases, that she never cried about either death again; she didn’t have the need because she had fully released her tears, as opposed to burying her feelings. Did she still experience sadness months and years later? Yes, of course, but the intensity of that sadness was entirely gone, which meant that no “emotional blocks” had been created. This means that she will not be triggered by those same or similar events again later in life. This also means that she will not develop negative behaviour or patterns, in order to be heard, because she is at peace with those painful events in her life.

If you love this blog, won’t you vote for us?  You’ll find the link in the sidebar to the right of this post. If you are reading this post via email, please click here to be taken to the website where you’ll find the vote box.  All you have to do is click on the box. There is nothing more required!  This automatically registers a vote for my blog. It’s quite simple.  Thank you for your support.

As always, I welcome your feedback. Please share your stories on this topic and encourage others to help their children express themselves! Would you like to connect? You can reach me via email or phone, leave a comment right here on the site, or click the connect tab at the bottom of the screen if you are reading this post on the website.

Until next time,

Meredith

Zinc – 10 Functions, 25 Signs of Deficiency & Increasing Your Stores

zinc deficiencyLike essential fatty acids and magnesium, zinc is one of the top deficiencies in today’s children. Zinc is probably involved in more body functions than any other mineral. This post outlines 10 functions of zinc, 25 signs of deficiency and what to do if you think you or your child are deficient.

Zinc is crucial for:

  • Thinking (Have you heard the expression “No zinc, no think”?)
  • The proper functioning of more than 100 enzymes
  • Normal growth and development
  • Body tissue health
  • The prevention of cavities
  • Proper sexual development and function
  • The immune system
  • The detoxification of chemicals and metabolic irritants
  • Carbohydrate metabolism
  • The body’s healing process i.e. wound healing

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Childrens’ Fevers Have An Important Purpose & Should Not Be Suppressed

children with feverAs parents, many of us tend to panic when our child has a fever, worrying that our child might not recover or might end up suffering from a seizure. Many of us give our child Tylenol or Advil without realizing that fevers have an important purpose and suppressing them with these medications can actually cause more harm than good. How does the body benefit from having a fever?

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The Importance of Speaking Our Truth

Speaking our truthThere comes a time in every person’s life when we need to make a decision – a decision to stand up for who we are; a decision to stand up and say what we believe in; a decision to expose secrets about ourselves that we have kept hidden; a decision to speak our truth. That time has come for me.

Many of you know that my thyroid has not worked properly for over a decade. It’s not a horrible situation and I take the lowest possible dose of natural thyroid but as long as I have had that imbalance, I have known that I have needed to speak my truth – there is always an emotional connection to our physical challenges. Please visit these prior blog posts on the subject; The Emotional Connection to Physical Illness and Emotional Causes of Physical Ailments.

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Magnesium – The Second Largest Mineral Deficiency

Products containing magnesiumMagnesium is second largest mineral deficiency in adults and children alike, after Essential Fatty Acids. It is estimated that 80 percent of the population is deficient in magnesium. In one of my prior posts, I told you that my hair analysis results showed that I had some vitamin and mineral deficiencies. My largest deficiency was Magnesium and second was Calcium. A week ago, I found an ionic version of Cal/Mag – ionic minerals are the most easily and well absorbed of all forms of minerals. The results of taking this supplement have been profound.

Magnesium is vital to the production of over 300 enzymes, particularly those involved in energy production. It is required in more than 500 biochemical processes within the body. It also assists in the absorption of calcium and potassium. Magnesium helps our body rid itself of the toxins we consume and face daily. A deficiency of magnesium causes our bodies to release more histamine, which increases severity of allergic symptoms i.e. coughing, congestion, irritability, fatigue, and muscle spasms. The more dairy that you or your child consumes, the more magnesium is needed. A deficiency in magnesium interferes with the transmission of nerve and muscle impulses, causing irritability and nervousness. Magnesium is a sedative, meaning it calms the nerves and muscles and is helpful with hyperactivity and insomnia.

In a study described in “Raising Psychic Children”, children who received magnesium supplements showed a significant decrease in hyperactivity. Another study found that 95% of ADHD children were deficient in magnesium.

“A child that is ticklish, sensitive, impulsive, and excitable can be low in calcium and magnesium, especially magnesium. Rhythmical activities like thumb sucking, bed rocking, hair twisting, and foot jiggling usually indicate low levels of calcium and magnesium. More stress increases these activities. These children are restless, squirmy, disturb others, and fail to finish tasks.”

Other symptoms of Magnesium/Calcium deficiency include:

  • Anxiety
  • Depression
  • Rapid heartbeat
  • Poor digestion
  • Grinding teeth
  • Cramping in calves
  • Abdominal pain
  • Headaches
  • Irritability
  • Hyperactivity
  • Constipation
  • Poor sleeping
  • Muscle weakness and twitching
  • Dizziness
  • Insomnia
  • Asthma
  • Chronic pain
  • Chronic fatigue

Magnesium depletors

Stress, too much exercise, or a diet high in salt, sugar, caffeine, alcohol, refined chocolate or fats can deplete magnesium stores in one’s body.

Food sources of magnesium

Magnesium is found in apples, apricots, avocados, bananas, peaches, cantaloupe, grapefruit, blackstrap molasses, oats, whole grains i.e. brown rice, raisins, figs, garlic, green leafy vegetables, nuts, sesame and sunflower seeds, beans, black-eyed peas, carrots, fish, dark good quality chocolate and others.

Thankfully, my only symptoms of being magnesium deficient were frequent chocolate cravings, not having large enough bowel movements (I had to go there, didn’t I?) minor digestive challenges and soreness in my body (particularly my neck) that was only detected at my monthly massage appointments. As a result of taking the supplement for only a short time, I have been detoxifying because I have not craved chocolate and I am having larger bowel movements than I have had in years (I went there again!) And my bloating is nothing compared to what it was. If any of you are experiencing any of the symptoms of magnesium deficiency, I strongly encourage you to look into supplementing with this miracle mineral.

If you love this blog, won’t you vote for us?  You’ll find the link in the sidebar to the right of this post. If you are reading this post via email, please click here to be taken to the website where you’ll find the vote box.  All you have to do is click on the box. There is nothing more required!  This automatically registers a vote for my blog. It’s quite simple.  Thank you for your support.

Would you like to connect? You can reach me via email or phone, leave a comment right here on the site, or click the connect tab at the bottom of the screen if you are reading this post on the website.

Until next time,

Meredith

Causes and Help for Combatting Stress in Your Child

stressed kidsHere are some of the causes of stress, the impact of stress on the body, how to know if your child is stressed and a few unique ideas for combating stress. Only you, the parent, can help your child combat their stress.

Some of the Causes of Stress

Children certainly feel stress and anxiety. Many children are actually more sensitive to things being out of balance than are adults. Over-scheduling, working parents, social media and peer pressure, combined with a general lack of exercise are only some of the causes of this stress. High consumption of white sugar, white flour products and other refined foods also stress the body. If your child is eating foods to which they are sensitive, this also increases the stress levels in their body.

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3 Top Nutrients in Pregnancy

20022397_sRecently, I began teaching from a new textbook for the Pediatric Nutrition course at the Canadian School of Natural Nutrition.  The book, “The Nourishing Traditions Book of Baby and Child Care” does an excellent job of emphasizing the importance of nutrition prior to conceiving and once a baby is conceived.  It correctly states that “No other society is as careless about preparation for pregnancy and birth as our own.”  Here is a summary of the importance of the 3 top nutrients in pregnancy; I think you will find this to be rather shocking information.

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Hair Mineral Analysis – Learn About Your Underlying Health Challenges

hair mineral analysisHair mineral analysis is one of the best kept secrets to attaining better health and it has been performed by laboratories for decades.  Some laboratories are more accurate than others and certain technicians are more adept at interpreting the results than others.  The majority of health challenges are associated with mineral imbalances or toxic metal excesses; hair mineral analysis is a way to learn of our underlying health challenges.   I have recently learned of a lab that Dr. Zoltan Rona uses to help his clients.  Dr. Rona wrote the Foreword for my first book.  He is a medical doctor that implements natural solutions with incredible success; I have great respect for his knowledge and work, and recently for the lab with which he has partnered, called CanAlt Health Laboratories.

As hair grows, it forms a permanent record of the body’s nutritional deficiencies or excesses.  Hair mineral analysis is a screening test to measure the levels of up to 60 essential minerals and heavy metals.  With correct testing and interpretation, one can construct a complete metabolic profile of the human body.   High levels of toxic metals, for example, can inhibit the body’s ability to process and assimilate specific nutritional elements that are essential to good health.

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15 Factors that Affect Fertility

factors affecting fertilityInfertility is the inability of sexually active couples to conceive a baby after one year of unprotected sex.  Approximately 14% of couples are infertile and the percentage is climbing.  In a nutshell, our world is more toxic than ever before.  Nutrition affects all aspects of health, including fertility.  Please read on to learn about 15 factors that affect fertility; 5 that can negatively impact it, 5 factors that can increase it and 5 vitamins or minerals that can improve it!

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Our Children Are Our Mirrors

The Resourceful MotherNot only do children often look like their parents, they often end up being like their parents.  We can literally view our children as hand mirrors that reflect not only the messages and cues they receive from us but also, our thoughts and actions.

If we are still wounded (incomplete or hurt) from our childhood, we will wound our child, usually without being conscious of it.  If we were not accepted by our parents for who we are, we, in turn, might not accept or value our child for who they are.  If we are worried about being separated from our child, bedtime might be a nightly battleground for us or our child might be worried about starting school and leaving us.  If we are frequently angry, we might teach our child to be angry.  If we have an exaggerated sense of responsibility for our child and allow our mind to work overtime, our child might be busy, restless or unable to fall asleep quickly or sleep soundly.  Unfortunately, whatever we have not dealt with from our past, we pass onto our children.

Whatever character trait we don’t like in our child usually mirrors something we don’t like in ourselves.   Each time a mother sees her daughter lazing about the house, she finds herself getting really angry.  Telling her daughter that she is lazy is not going to incite a work ethic in her; in fact it will accomplish the exact opposite and the daughter will only resent her mother for not seeing the beauty inside her.  When the mother delves into her deeper feelings about this, she realizes that she has a tendency to be lazy and has set this example for her daughter.  The mother has a choice as to whether she accepts her laziness and thereby accepts that aspect of herself or whether she takes steps to change that aspect of herself so that her daughter doesn’t adopt this trait for life.  There are positive aspects of each seemingly negative trait.  The mother may come to the realization that her laziness is a good thing because relaxing in our society is under-rated!  As long as we are accomplishing things at other times of the day, being lazy for a few hours a day can be just what the body and mind require.  When we become less critical of ourselves, we become more supportive of our children.  But if this mother feels that her laziness is too much for her liking, she may decide to start living her life in a way in which she could never be described as lazy and will get one step closer to becoming the energetic, goal-achieving person she wants to become.

One of the biggest tasks in parenting is seeing things from a perspective that does not necessarily come easily to us.  If we can look at each challenge with our child as an opportunity to understand ourselves more than ever before and as potential for further growth, this helps us ease up on our children and prevents us from seeing things as “wrong.”  In fact, this is how we convert our “problem child” into our teacher!

If you love this blog, won’t you vote for us?  You’ll find the link in the sidebar to the right of this post. If you are reading this post via email, please click here to be taken to the website where you’ll find the vote box.  Just click on the box. This registers a vote for my blog. There is nothing more you need to do! It’s quite simple. Thank you for your support.

Would you like to connect? You can reach me via email or phone, leave a comment right here on the site, or click the connect tab at the bottom of the screen if you are reading this post on the website.

Until next time,

Meredith